Silencing My Inner Critic Through Sharing My Photographs
I come from a family of artists. Painters, craftspeople, designers, writers, and photographers, you name it. Sometimes, I’d find myself wishing that I was extremely good at the arts, just like the rest of my family. I never seemed to catch on, as I’ve always felt like my skills had to amount to something bigger. In fact, I get imposter syndrome quite often, telling myself that there are better writers, painters, photographers, and designers out there.
Anyone who knows how strong self-talk can be knows it’s challenging to get to the point where you stand up and start something. I’ve been through the motions before, trying something and failing miserably. While it does leave you down, it really shows you new perspectives.
One day, I happened to have a chat with an aunt who is a professional photographer. As someone who had just gotten into photography, she mentioned another photographer in our family she looks up to, and that was my mom. It wasn’t because mom had the best gear or studied the field; it was because of something more.
Out of the multiple photo albums in our house, my mom can pull one out and tell you all about the photos taken. There is a 99% chance she remembers why she took the picture and what exactly was going on at that time. It was peculiar to see how she could vividly tell the stories, and it felt as if you were there with her.
We chanced upon her photos of her date with some United States Marines stationed in Japan when they were on vacation. She remembered their names and even remembered that there were probably some CIA operatives at one point. There were plenty of other photos, and it showed me another side of taking pictures. Photos don’t always have to be for showing others or galleries, but they can also be beautifully embedded into our memories for the years to come.
I still often try and rush myself to get better at photography. Sometimes, I still set the bar way too high and try to chase unrealistic standards and paths for my photography. I’m guilty of losing my vision and finding my style because of it. However, I am trying, and I’m still on the journey to finding my own style.
The Start of a New Journey
I believe that photography’s most significant impact as an invention is the ability to capture moments that would have otherwise been forever lost to time.
A few years back, I never would have picked up a camera because I really had no interest. When people would talk about new releases in camera technology, I only really cared if my phone took good enough photos. However, this changed when I lost a close friend to suicide, and I had no pictures of him or us. By then, it was too late, and all I could think about was making sure that never happened again.
Sure enough, I got into photography slowly. I started taking more photos, looking at more photographic works, and immersed myself in new cameras. With my new collection of film cameras my dad and I bought in Japan, I promised to make new memories with people, and never live life knowing that I lost memories to time.
That’s when I started to define photography for myself. I believe that photography’s most significant impact as an invention is the ability to capture moments that would have otherwise been forever lost to time. Without photos, we would have no proof of so many things. Whether it’s happy memories, funny moments, or bouts of emotion, all of these are immortalized through the camera.
Today, I shoot photos to have tangible memories of friends and family, and I want to remind people that “good” photography is what you make it to be. I’m by no means close to professional levels of photography, but I know for sure that I enjoy taking photos of friends and family so that I can look back at them and remember those moments in time. The last thing I want is to regret not having anything to look back at when the time comes, and pictures are practically all we have to remember those who have passed.
So here’s to a start of a new journey in photography. One not crowded in likes or shares, but instead, one coming from the heart and passion for the art.
